This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
How naked do you want me to be?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
