We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
