that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize