Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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