he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
