she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Randomize
