do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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