Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
