we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
