Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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