We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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