Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
