JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
