Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
That accounts for only three of the penises
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
