I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
