I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize