god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Dick very happy bro
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
