You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize