Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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