yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
