Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
