It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
