Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
