so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize