so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
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