I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Randomize
