john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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