I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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