I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize