I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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