afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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