Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
