it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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