i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize
