Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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