Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
