You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
