Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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