Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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