That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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