Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
