i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
