Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
