In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
