I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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