Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
