I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
