Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize