I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
