I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
