Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
