The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
